It's so nice not to be in Nanaimo

A successful expedition to Nanaimo (which could more accurately be called Stripmallville, as that’s basically what it is – miles and miles and miles of malls).

As I push a trolley loaded up with a weed whacker, shovel, rake, hose and various other pieces of pilfered garden equipment, I pass a woman who eyes the contents and comments that I’m obviously going to be starting a lot of gardening this weekend. I tell her I am simply replacing items nicked from my shed. She commiserates, tells me she’s had the same problem – including the theft of a 60 pound garden gnome. (Man, that’s one big garden gnome.) Same story at the check out when the cashier also comments on the amount of gardening I plan and I give the same reply. She’s lost track of the things stolen from her garage.

Okay, I have to ask: What’s with this epidemic of horticultural tea leaves? I know Nanaimo, in addition to its surfeit of strip malls, has a major drug problem, but, bloody hell, how much of a fix can you get selling a garden hose? Is there a dodgy second hand garden equipment store somewhere in the back streets of Nanaimo where the oily, bent proprietor will take all garden-related paraphernalia off your hands, no questions asked? Unlikely, I know, but what other possible explanation is there? (Other than juvenile delinquents just being bloody annoying.)

Succumb at the gardening shop to my need for instant gratification and buy some actual plants: two Sweet 100 cherry tomatoes, a mini pumpkin, a spaghetti squash and, despite my complete previous failure to ever get a single red pepper off one, a red pepper plant (never say never). Of course I know this is cheating, that real gardeners grow everything from seeds (no doubt lovingly saved from last year’s abundant crop), but I need to see some action.

Commented in an email to my semi-homesteading in Kent friend Rowan that the whole garden project is so far behind schedule I probably can’t get any veg out of it this year and receive the following reply.

Things you can grown now are:

• Lettuce & rocket, keep sowing every couple of weeks and keep growing.
• Courgettes will probably still be fine, start a couple off indoors to give them a start.
• Peas will be fine.
• Beans will probably be fine too - we've had such cold weather that my beans are still less than a foot high.
• Sow some kale and sprouting broccoli in pots to plant out later for winter crops. Kale is super hardy and you'll be eating it all winter and sprouting broccoli will fruit in spring.
• Sow some leeks in a big pot of compost and when they get pencil width wide you can plant them out, another good winter crop.
• You can still sow carrots.
• There are some potatoes you can sow in late august for a Christmas crop, well you can in the UK at least.
• Beetroots, you can also eat the leafs like Swiss chard (same family).

Hmm. That all sounds rather ambitious. Well, at least I have the excuse of not getting to the chard and kale that the high levels of Vitamin K mess up Mike’s blood count. Otherwise, I am devoid of excuses to not get my ass in gear. Thanks, Rowan.

Time to actually get out into the garden. Watch this space.

P.S. Lovely dinner last night of pasta with prawns and asparagus in a lemon olive oil sauce with lots of fresh herbs.